Luckily I was pretty productive today considering the funk I’ve been in lately; at least it helped stave off my anxiety for a while. With it being the last couple weeks of the semester, and that I’m in classes for an English major, I have a couple projects that I managed to make some progress on.
The most interesting one I’ve been working on is my presentation for my Wisconsin Indian Literature class; the topic is: two-spirit or berdache. Simply put, two-spirit people are basically the LGBTQ of Native Americans.
Two-spirited people are those who either are born male or female, but identify as the opposite gender, typically by wearing cloths associated and performing tribal roles associated with that gender, or they identify with their birth gender, but are attracted to the same sex and may express some qualities of the opposite gender. There are even a third and fourth gender for these kinds of people: woman-man and man-woman.
The cool thing about this is that, for the most part, these people are still accepted in the tribe despite who they are, and are not looked down upon if they have a same-sex relationship; they are sometimes held in high regard because they typically hold spiritual, medicinal, and sometimes political roles in the tribe.
I haven’t looked too much into this concept yet, but from what I can gather, two-spirited people are simply expressing who they are in spirit, not how they are defined by their physical appearance. In a way, I try to see people in the same way: who they are as a person, in spirit, and not by what they look like on the outside; I guess this is also another reason why I’ve been questioning my orientation.
Later tonight, I got a chance to video chat with Pordz. I wanted to find a private enough space because I knew it was going to be awkward, and boy was it awkward as hell. With it being the nearing Final’s Week, all the study rooms were full, so I asked my friend Joe if I could come over, which I did. Poor Joe, having to overhear and awkward conversation between two furries. Still, it was nice that I got to talk with Pordz like this.
Afterwards, I pretty much just chilled for the rest of the night, had a smoke, had a beer, then went to bed. Honestly, I’m glad I had a good day for a change.