May 12, 2015

Finals week started yesterday, as well as my final for Diversity of Life. All in all, I think I just did…ok; I don’t think my grade will really change much, if at all, and it’s at a C right now. I know for sure I did well in my other two classes at least.

Not much happened today since I only had my shortest shift and no final; however, this afternoon, I went to a small graduation party for one of my friends. It wasn’t super big, just me and a few other friends pretty much hung out in the basement of one of the resident halls and played a couple board games (well technically card games since we played Fluxx and Chrononauts). My friend who was graduating doesn’t know a lot of people and is pretty introverted and not all that social; but I don’t consider that a bad thing since I’m the same way.

However, late last night, I posted something on Facebook and Tumblr about how I think I don’t make a difference in other people’s lives; the Tumblr version was way more detailed as I’m connected with more people I know IRL and family on Facebook, so I didn’t want to be too specific. Basically this all stemmed from the fact I’m not living independently right now and that I feel stuck in that area. Also, there was the fact that if I can’t provide for myself, how will I be able to provide for the other person in a relationship? This, of course, led me to going on about how I constantly wonder why I’m still single and that I haven’t found anyone, and that I haven’t had a relationship at all.

Throughout the day, I would get a notification on my phone that said “so-and-so commented on your status.” They were words of encouragement, though pretty general statements, but only one person gave an example of how they’ve been making a difference in other’s lives and someone else gave an example of how I positively affected their life. My friend, Chris, however, personally messaged me about it. I was definitely not expecting that, and I was really surprised that he was the only one who personally approached me about it, even if it was online.

I ended up talking with him during my whole, two-hour shift this afternoon going into more detail as to why I feel the way I do. In a nutshell, he said he would be willing to come up to where I’m at and take me around to apply at places, then come up about two weeks later to follow-up on those places. He would also be willing to come up and take me to take the driver’s test to get my license after I schedule it. (You have to schedule to take the driver’s test in Wisconsin during the work week and during when people would normally be at work since that’s when the DMV’s open; the closest one to me isn’t open on weekends. Why you couldn’t just go in, say you want to take the test, wait for a long time, take and pass the test, and get your license like how it is in Illinois is beyond me. I think they even have to mail it to you too.)

I’m truly thankful that he’s willing to do this; I’ve been stuck with this and unhappy about it for too long.

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